To the editor:
I caught up with Rockingham Guns & Ammo denizen, Fly-On-The-Wall, and his uncle Buzz, at a local pub. The latest Robert Lee column was roiling the conversation. “Scandal free?!” Buzz croaked over his nearly empty suds. “Why, Obama should be impeached for claiming that about his administration!”
“It’ll be hard to impeach him, Buzz”, a nearly pie-eyed Fly retorted, “he’s out of office!”
“We need some definitions, guys,” I broke in. “Some folks think it’s a ‘scandal’ that either Obama or Trump wakes up each morning, right?”
“Uh, yeah,” Buzz answered from under his slightly askew ‘MAGA’ cap. I continued, “Well, let’s agree that a real scandal requires actual charges, indictments, etc.” Buzz and Fly slurred consent.
Pondering a moment, Fly noted, “Well, then, Robert’s column is torpedoed.”
“How’s that?” Buzz squawked over a fresh brew.
“Fly’s right, Buzz. No Obama officials were convicted, indicted, or charged in any scandal. Now what about Trump’s folks?”
Fly shook his head, “Geez, I’ve lost count!” “What about Fast & Furious, Solyndra, and 8 percent unemployment for most of Obama’s term?” Buzz complained.
“Most of those so-called scandals were poorly executed policies, not criminal. An investigation revealed that Fast & Furious was bungled below the Justice Department and White House levels,” Fly noted.
“And his 8 percent unemployment claim is plainly wrong,” I added. “The rate was under 8 percent during the last 53 of his 96 months. Actually, it declined steadily after his first year.”
“Well, wasn’t the health insurance system working OK before Obamacare, like he said” Buzz sheepishly asked, “and how about the big Trump stock market rally?”
“Well, that Trump rally has floundered under his ridiculous tariffs,” Fly retorted, “and don’t you recall how many folks were getting kicked off the insurance rolls for pre-existing conditions?”
“Oh, yeah … I forgot,” Buzz mumbled, stuffing his ‘MAGA’ cap in his back pocket.
“Why isn’t Robert using his opinion columns for victory laps instead of that tired Obama stuff?” I mused.
“Sure,” Fly chimed in, “his pals control the White House … the Supreme Court for the next generation, now … the Senate … the House …”
“Wait’ll November,” Buzz noted, a bit pained, “the Dems will have the House again.”
“Don’t count on it,” Fly warned.
“Why not?” Buzz asked.
“Remember ‘President’ Hillary?’” I cautioned.
“Yeah,” Fly moped. “After all, they’re Democrats!”